If you've done nothing wrong, why be afraid?
We often get people calling and saying that they have a problem with their neighbour but that they want to remain anonymous - for example, the mediation that Marcus, Michelle and I tried to do last night. I tried to no avail to convince the complainant that it was better if the complainant spoke to the neighbour himself because it really is better for neighbourly relations rather than getting someone else involved. However, he refused and said it might make relations between them sour. I find the opposite to usually be true. Imagine you're the person being complained about - now you wonder why the person could not just talk to you. Did they dislike you that much for example?
Someone also wrote in and said that she was concerned they were trapping cats at a religious place she attended. She was upset and wanted me to speak with the management However she also wanted to remain anonymous. I have been trying to tell her that it gives far more credibility to say that so-and-so wants to bring up something they are concerned with, rather than an 'anonymous worshipper'.
We will get involved in both situations, but I wonder why people don't just come right out and say they have a problem to whomever they are having a problem with. It does not need to be rude or confrontational. In both these cases for example, the parties could always say they are concerned and would like to help control the community cat population through sterilisation.
I sometimes think that some Singaporeans are a seething mass of frustration because they would rather let their frustration fester than talk to the other party. Eventually, the frustration will come to a boil.