Tuesday, June 12, 2007

Putting the cat's welfare first

I just spoke with a nice lady who is moving and has a community cat who goes into her garden. The cat very much liked her husband, but unfortunately does not like her very much, though he is friendly to other people. He also does not like being kept indoors though he will come in to sleep and rest.

Unfortunately the woman's husband passed away recently and the cat has been more upset than usual. He sleeps on her husband's belongings. She also has to move to a condominium. She was thinking of putting the cat up for adoption.

The nice thing though was that even though the cat is 'difficult' (she commented he has never once purred) and tends to hiss at her, she is putting the cat up for adoption more because she is worried that HE won't be happy. When we spoke about some of the options for quite a while, she said as much as possible she would like to be able to keep the cat with her, and she's willing to try very hard to keep him with her as long as the cat is contented. She's worried mostly that he will be very unhappy in an apartment. She told me that he has the most unique personality and that she is very fond of him - but sadly that he just isn't that crazy about her. She also said that when she contemplated moving the most important thing is her cat - she said after all the rest of the items aren't living animals.

I told her that having an understanding person with her looking after him (and not expecting him to be a cuddly lap cat) may be the best thing for her cat.



Blogger Mary said...

This lady is so kind. Given time, i believe the cat will love her as much as it loves her husband. Relationship between the cat and her husband is indeed special - i guess this is what we call karmic connection. This cat would indeed be a good companion for her because this cat would remind her of her husband in a positive way.

12/6/07 1:01 PM  
Blogger calsifer said...

*you know, I thought I must be hallucinating while reading this at first, but I'm moping at my desk in the office and not lying in bed, so it must be real*

Thank goodness for the cat that he has such a nice lady looking out for him! I'd smack him ont the upside with a large trout if I'd though that would wake him up to her kindness! But well, love can't be made to order. This is so achingly sweet.

But it's people like her who makes me keep believing there's still some good in this warped world humans made and lord over.

She is such a rarity, in this day and age filled more with the generic dog owner portrayed in Jim Willis', who also has a site here, "How Could You?" (alt link) or the care-less cat adopters/owners in "Free Kittuns" and "Beloved of Bast".

12/6/07 1:02 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I was with a cacucasian friend who told me this story. Back home where he came from, his mother used to have a cat, they both didnt like each other and the cat would scratch him and he would kick the cat. That was when he was a teen. Then one day he saw the cat fall off the fence and in the min, he felt something for the cat and ran to see if it was alrite. The cat was hanging on for dear life with one paw and trying to climb back up. He climb the fence and rescued the cat and for some strange reason, ever since that day, the cat never scratched him and yes thankfully he stopped kicking the cat... and they became best friends.

12/6/07 1:35 PM  
Blogger Dawn said...

Yes calsifer - sometimes you wish you could tell the CATS off for what they have.

She has spoken with her vet about solutions too- and was very proactive about trying to do something. It IS a very pretty cat but she mentioned that he has the most unusual, headstrong personality and that's what she loves about him.

12/6/07 1:35 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

she must be quite an unusual person then! :)

most ppl i know don't like cats precisely for their independent and headstrong ways. they can only deal with doormat personalities! i say that attitude says more abt the ppl themselves than anythg else. lol.

kudos to this lady!

12/6/07 2:10 PM  
Anonymous belle said...

she sounds like a nice lady ... pls tell her - to speak in a soft voice to the cat, handle it gently, avoid abrupt movements around the cat, give it lots of treats - im sure the cat will grow to like her eventually, seems that she's not a difficult person to like ... :-)

12/6/07 3:46 PM  
Blogger Dawn said...

The cat has been with her for a year and a half. Sadly the cat was more attached to her husband who passed away rather suddenly - I think both of them are grieving in their own ways.

Plus she did seem very soft spoken on the phone :)

12/6/07 4:05 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

maybe you want to let her know that being a adult non predigree cat, its chances of adoption is pretty slim and being not friendly, it is unlikely to get adopted or may get thrown into the streets when the new owner runs out of patience. If she really loves the cat then she should keep it.

12/6/07 4:44 PM  
Blogger calsifer said...

I can't help coming back to this.

If it helps, please let this lady know our 5 yr old Rheilly whom we brought home last March after caring for her as a stray for most of her life, not only hissed but actually will attack our Mum in the beginning, even though our Mum is the food provider for breakfast. We've never figured out why as our Mum actually has very good rapport with the others, and she will care for and fret over them too. The cloest we got to solving the mystery is that the first time Rheilly met our Mum, she was holding a broom and span. As a homeless cat, we have noticed that Rheilly is very frightened of the cleaners. Rheilly hissed and tried to attack the broom/ our Mum.

Since then things seem to go downhill. Our Mum was in fact very wary of her too, and I guess much like this lady, she's quite wistful that Rheilly didn't take to her like she does to us. There was no signs of improvement at all, until this January past, when Rheilly suddenly approached our Mum and asked for scritches and purred one day. Needless to say, our Mum was over the moon. However, things don't change overnight, Rheilly still hisses (though a lot less) and attacks our Mum (though now only if she was spooked). But she's definitely more affable with our Mum already.

It has taken a long time and will tkae longer yet, but perhaps this lady can use her role as food provider to help her relationship with the cat - i believe it did for Rheilly and our Mum. I'm rooting for this lady =)

12/6/07 5:15 PM  
Blogger Dawn said...

Hi Anonymous, yes she is aware of that. She has said that if at all possible, if her cat isn't unhappy, she'd like to keep him.

Great Calsifer - I'll let her know! Only three more years to go ;)

12/6/07 5:18 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Maybe....just maybe, the cat is an unhappy cat - just like some people are never happy. Happiness is just a state of mind, perhaps the cat is just plain grouchy. It may be contented being in that state.

12/6/07 8:09 PM  
Blogger Dawn said...

Could be - I have a pretty grouchy cat too though she has mellowed (a little) with age.

12/6/07 10:48 PM  
Anonymous cat talk said...

Cats know who likes them and who doesn't. When my mum comes, all the cats would ignore her. When I return, they fight and the whole gets quite busy and noisy. Or cat knows something about how the husband felt about his wife. Humans see things from the surface, animals have different gifts, more powerful than we think.

Humans have become arrogant and think they know better so they start treating animals like enemies. Like the no strays policy.

12/6/07 11:37 PM  

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